function get_date(maxNum)

{

  today=new Date();

  t=today.getDate()

  return t;

}

function dateQuote()

{

  var maxQuotes=31;

  var dQuote=get_date(maxQuotes);

  dQuote--;

var quote=new Array(maxQuotes)

  quote[0]="You know you are getting old when all the names in your black book have MD after them. (Harrison Ford)";

  quote[1]="Oh, they have the Internet on computers now. (Homer Simpson)";

  quote[2]="From sublime to ridiculousness there is only one step. (Napoleon)";

  quote[3]="Words ought to be a little wild for they are the assaults of thought on the unthinking. (John Maynard Keynes)";

  quote[4]="Black holes are where God divided by zero. (Steven Wright)";

  quote[5]="Law is mind without reason. (Aristotle)";

  quote[6]="To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all. (Oscar Wilde)";

  quote[7]="I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by. (Douglas Adams)";

  quote[8]="If only we'd stop trying to be happy we could have a pretty good time. (Edith Wharton)";

  quote[9]="When everything seems to be going against you, remember that the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it. (When everything seems to be going against you, remember that the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it. (Henry Ford)";

  quote[10]="Doubt is not a pleasant condition, but certainty is absurd. (Voltaire)";

  quote[11]="Assassination is the extreme form of censorship. (Karl Marx)";

  quote[12]="Genius may have its limitations, but stupidity is not thus handicapped. (Elbert Hubbard)";

  quote[13]="Television has brought back murder into the home - where it belongs. (Alfred Hitchcock)";

  quote[14]=" I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance - waiting for the bathroom. (Bob Hope)";

  quote[15]="And in the end it's not the years in your life that count. It is the life in your years. (And in the end it's not the years in your life that count. It is the life in your years. (Abraham Lincoln)";

  quote[16]="It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog. (Mark Twain)";

  quote[17]="You may have to fight a battle more than once to win it. (Margaret Thatcher)";

  quote[18]="What is robbing a bank compared with founding a bank? (Bertolt Brecht)";

  quote[19]=" Frazier is so ugly that he should donate his face to the US Bureau of Wild Life. (Muhammad Ali)";

  quote[20]="Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. That's relativity. (Albert Einstein)";

  quote[21]="Remember when life's path is steep to keep your mind even. (Horace)";

  quote[22]="Non è abbastanza fare dei passi che un giorno ci porteranno ad uno scopo, ogni passo deve essere lui stesso uno scopo, nello stesso tempo in cui ci porta avanti. (Goethe)";

  quote[23]="That's one small step for a man, one giant leap for mankind. (Neil Armstrong)";

  quote[24]="The best weapon against an enemy is another enemy. (Friedrich Nietzsche)";

  quote[25]="There's only one way to have a happy marriage and as soon as I learn what it is I'll get married again. (Clint Eastwood')";

  quote[26]="America is a mistake, a giant mistake. (Sigmund Freud)";

  quote[27]="Doctors are the same as lawyers; the only difference is that lawyers merely rob you, whereas doctors rob you and kill you too. (Anton Chekhov)";

  quote[28]=" A day without laughter is a day wasted. (Charlie Chaplin)";

  quote[29]="Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go, it's a pretty good empty experience. (Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go, it's a pretty good empty experience. (Woody Allen)";

  quote[30]=" Violence is the last refuge of the incompetent. (Isaac Asimov)";

  document.write(quote[dQuote]);
}